Healing from Childhood Trauma
with Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapy
The internal family systems (IFS) model is a powerful approach to understanding and healing attachment trauma.
This model views our inner experience as being composed of different parts, each with its own unique perspective, motivations, and needs.
These parts include: vulnerable, wounded “inner child” (the exile), and protective, defensive “inner protector” (manager and firefighter).
Besides these parts, we also have a compassionate, nurturing “inner parent”(Self).
When it comes to attachment trauma, the internal family systems model helps us to understand how our different parts can be impacted by experiences of neglect, abuse, or abandonment.
For example, client Jane experienced significant emotional neglect from her parents during her childhood. As a result, her inner child, or the “exile” in IFS language, felt scared, hurt, and confused, while her inner protectors, or the “managers” and “firefighters” in IFS language, tried to protect her by minimizing the trauma and keeping her away from its painful impact. These dynamics created a cycle of pain and suffering that was difficult for Jane to break free from.
(Disclaimer: Please note that the stories shared in this blog are fictional and do not reflect the experiences of any real individuals. Any similarities to real persons or events are purely coincidental. The names and details have been changed in order to protect the confidentiality of my clients.)
Fortunately, the internal family systems model also offers tools and techniques for healing our wounded inner children.
In Jane's case, we worked together to create a safe and supportive inner environment, where her inner child could feel heard, validated, and nurtured.
This involved working with Jane’s inner protector, to get to know their fears and concerns, so the inner protector can relax and soft back a little bit.
Then Jane’s inner parent, or the “Self” in IFS language, can step in with Self energy, to offer comfort and reassurance, as well as witness the inner child’s experience with compassion and love.
Through this process, Jane was able to heal her inner child from these attachment wounds, free her protectors from extreme protective roles, so Jane can develop a more peaceful and loving inner life, which in return, reflect back to her external life and relationships.
One key aspect of trauma work in the internal family systems model is the recognition that trauma creates burdens on our different parts.
For example, Jane's inner child felt overwhelmed by fear and pain from the emotional neglect by her parents. And Jane’s inner protector felt overburdened by the need to constantly prove her worth to her parents. By recognizing and releasing these burdens, we were able to restore balance and harmony within Jane's internal world, allowing her to heal and move forward.
Overall, the internal family systems model offers a holistic and compassionate approach to healing attachment trauma. By working with our different parts and creating a supportive inner environment, we can begin to heal our wounded inner children and move towards a more peaceful and fulfilling inner life.
This approach can be particularly helpful for individuals who have experienced neglect, abuse, or abandonment in their childhood, and are looking for effective tools and techniques to heal from these experiences.
Dora Dui Chen, LCSW
Dora is a Certified Internal Family Systems (IFS) Therapist who specializes in treating complex trauma, attachment trauma, and relationship stress. She provides holistic therapy services to individuals in California, as well as clinical consultation, training, and workshops to professionals.
With a focus on cross-cultural and minority experiences, Dora is dedicated to supporting individuals and professionals in their journey towards emotional well-being and growth.
For more information, please visit her website.